OLD people

[John Luciano]

An elderly couple are attending church services.

About halfway through, she writes a note and hands it to her husband.

It says, "I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?"

He scribbles back, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid!"

 

[Simdog]

This reminds me of the one where the sermon is about forgiving your enemies. The pastor starts off talking about how everybody has enemies, and if there was anybody who thinks they don't have enemies, raise your hand. A 93-year old lady in the back raises her hand. The pastor says that everybody has enemies of some sort. The lady replied, "Not me." When the pastor asked how is it that everybody else has some type of enemy except her, she stated, "Because I outlived those bitches!!!"

 

[Gorilla]

those are funny i dont care who you are

 

[skuuter]

GOOD ONES....:laugh:

 

[LadyKitty]

How about this one:

When asked by a young patrol officer, "Do you know you were speeding?"

This 83-year-old woman talked herself out of a ticket by stating ......

"Yes, but....I had to get there before I forgot where I was going."

Makes perfectly good sense to me.

 

[Southern Man]

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day
my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a
cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"

He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a crazy Nazi. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for
having worn tires. So my wife called him a block-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes.. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote...
Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus and saw the car had an Obama sticker... We try to have a little fun each
day now that we're retired.. It's important at our age.